Ministry of Zero

My first and last post of 2025.
Here I am again for my... 17th annual life recap!

Oh wow, it's already the 17th year.
This is something I can count as consistency, no?

Writing this 6 hours before the year officially turns over.
Here we go.

Note: I know that the recap is not recorded in great detail like in my previous recaps, but trust me, I genuinely had a lot of fun putting this together as I looked back and reminisced about my 2025.


For  previous references:
2008 | 2009 | 2010 | 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021 | 2022 | 2023 | 2024

고마워요, 1월

January. Beginning of the year.

I started my new year with... badminton!
Yep, I tried to make a new (and fairly healthy) habit: playing badminton with my brothers at least once every weekend. It turned out to be genuinely fun!

Toward the end of the month, flooding hit due to heavy rain ahead of Chinese New Year.
Well, this was also the month I decided the destination for my annual birthday plan -- though I only finalized the final itinerary on... D-1. Pfft.

Honorable mention: INFINITE 15th ANNIVERSARY CONCERT.
My first concert of the year -- and the first INFINITE concert in Jakarta in a decade!
I even won the raffle for a group photo and got the chance to stand right in front of my bias, Sunggyu.
So, yeah, this earned the most honorable mention of the month!

My first (and currently the only) photo group with idols!

---

Merci, Février

February was a rainy, rainy, rainy month.
It may be he shortest month of the year, but those 28 days were surprisingly busy (for me).

I watched a new Korean drama series, "Melo Movie".
In case you don't know, I'm not usually a K-drama person.
No particular dislike, just not especially drawn to romance genre.
Though I do have a soft spot for slice of life genre, hence I tried to watch "Melo Movie".

There's one line from the series that stayed with me:
"After all, life goes on far longer than a movie."

Honorable mention: YOASOBI ASIA TOUR in Jakarta.
My first Japanese concert ever, and it was an absolute blast! I had so much fun singing along with them.

Oh, also, "Conclave", easily one of my favorite movies of 2025. I even watched it twice!

Fun fact: I purchased the ticket only 10 hours before the show. To the good person who made that possible -- thank you!

---

Danke, März

March marked the beginning of the Lenten season.

This month I decided to try something new: a make-up class.
First of all, I'm not particularly good at make-up, but I figured -- why not try? Who knows, maybe I'd discover a hidden passion.

But, yeah, no. lol.
Still, it was an interesting experience, and I'm glad I gave it a shot!

I also got the chance to help organize my (office) team's Iftar Gathering at SPARK.

Another highlight: my beloved Corgi, Loki, turned 4 this month!
He also visited my (new but still very much a work in progress to be a good place to live) house -- and he absolutely loved being there.

March was also when I started enjoying digging and learning information with the help of AI. It's a fun challenge to make sure the information I get is actually valid. Yeah, I've become surprisingly skeptical.

Honorable mention: "Adolescence".
4 episodes, incredible one-shot techniques, and powerful performances.

Also "Light Shop", a Korean drama series.
Though labeled as horror, it felt far more like... a deeply human story to me. I really loved this series.

Please, don't ask me to help anyone with make-up. I'll never be good at it, I think, lol

---

Grazie, Aprile

April was marked by Easter.

This month, I tried a new AI technology called "Sesame" -- a friend recommended it to me.
It's seriously... impressive -- borderline "Black Mirror"-level scary in the besy way.
What made it especially interesting was that t felt like actually talking like... a human. It also turned out to be a great way to practice speaking English!

Coincidentally, "Black Mirror" Season 7 was also released this month.
The episode "Eulogy" stood out to me: beautiful, heartbreaking, and deeply human.

April was also the month J-pop quietly made its way back into my playlist. I discovered Takase Toya and tuki.!
From that point on, my music playlist shifted noticeably, with only a small number of K-pop songs making it into rotation.

Honorable mention: HIGHLIGHT / B2ST.
HIGHLIGHT, my number 1 idol group, finally regained the rights to their original name, "B2ST", after nine long years. *cry tears of joy*
This earned its place as April's most honorable mention.

I re-read Saiyuki series this month. Gosh, I love the series so much even after more than two decades~

---

谢谢，五月

May means one thing: birthday trip!

I have a promise to myself: to always try something new on my birthday,
This year, I decided to do a solo trip across 3 different cities in Malaysia: Penang, Ipoh, and Kuala Lumpur.

I'd been to Kuala Lumpur twice before, but Penang and Ipoh were completely new to me!
I only finalized my itinerary D-1 though -- not something I'm proud of but, well, still relieved that I pulled it together in the end.

Penang is an INCREDIBLE place for food. Even someone as picky as me loved the food, which says a lot.
Ipoh is a quieter, calmer city. I love the bean curd there! Oh, and I visited what they claimed was a haunted castle there. Fufufu.

For the first time, I also managed to mess up my own itinerary.
I misremembered my schedule from Ipoh to Kuala Lumpur properly. I was supposed to check out and take the train to KL on 28 May, but somehow wrote it as 29 May instead in my itinerary.

Oddly enough, that mistake taught me something important: not to spiral too much when things go wrong.
Of course, me being me, I still blamed myself -- but traveling solo meant I had no choice but to rely on myself to make quick, practical decisions and move forward.

In KL, I visited my very first anime expo/museum: Cardcaptor Sakura!
I was genuinely happy just being there! Everything was so pretty!

And that's my birthday trip, in short.

Outside of travel, I also noticed how many long-dormant movie franchises returned in 2025. This month brought "Final Destination" back after 14 years since FD5 -- pure nostalgia.

Honorable mention: my birthday solo trip. Period.
Also, "Sinners", a truly magnificent movie
And the song I replayed the most this month: "W/X/Y" by Tani Yuuki.

I want to visit more anime expo... Maybe, next time, in Japan? hehe

---

Gracias, Junio

Ah, June.

The month started with a few meetups with friends. One of them was visiting Jakarta while on a break from working overseas, and I also caught up with others here and there throughout the month.

June also marked the closing of my office's fiscal year.  There were some year-end events, followed by... a long stretch of waiting for announcements.

Well, not every day was smooth, though.

For the first time, I was involved in a small driving accident.
I bumped into the car in front of me. The damage was not severe but, well, let's just say I did have to pay for the dent. I handled it pretty calmly -- I think.

Honorable mention: "Wind Breaker" by Nii Satoru.

It's been a long time since I've been this invested in a manga/anime.
I started with the anime, but now I'm fully hooked on the ongoing manga.

And the opening song, "Zettai Reido" is an absolute banger, by the way.

Year-end team gathering : bowling!

---

Dank je, Juli

So ... July started with good news.

I was entrusted with a new responsibility -- despite my own doubts.

I am truly grateful, and I promised myself to do better, to prove that the trust wasn't given for nothing.

I also really enjoyed 2 movies this month: "Superman" and "Sore: Istri dari Masa Depan". Two of my favorites in 2025.

On the other hand, I deeply regretted watching one particular live-action adaptation of a manhwa I love. I don't even want to mention the title here. I even gave it a 1/10 score -- and that's coming from someone who usually rates generously (I think?)

Ah, also... It's the month I finally (really) let go of something I had been holding on to for a long time -- despite knowing it had been hurting me more than helping.

Looking back now, I guess I did become a little more mature? Haha.

Honorable mention: Ailee: ASCEND.

My third concert of 2025, and it's quite an intimate one.

I was seated quite close to the stage.

I've loved her voice since her debut in 2012, and honestly, her live performance is flawless.

Another honorable mention goes to "Rokutosei" by zarame.
This song was the reason I finally started watching "My Hero Academia" -- which will definitely come up again later.

Ailee is such a dork, effortlessly funny, and just a wonderful person to be around with.

---

Obrigado, Agosto

August opened with yet another concert: KOSTCON 2025 Tour.
Six different artists took the stage, all well-known for singing K-drama OSTs.

This month also marked my first-ever light novel purchase: "Bungo Stray Dogs", "Stormbringer".
I've always been a fan of the BSD series, but I'd never quite committed to buying the light novels -- probably because it had been a long time since I last bought a physical book.

Well. This was the beginning of me buying more light novels. HAHA.

I also got the chance to snap a photo with Ernest Prakasa and Kristo Immanuel after attending the early screening of "Tinggal Meninggal". It's a dark comedy movie which, ehem, perfectly suited to my sense of humor.

Toward the end of the month, though, some concerning issues arose, serious enough that we were advised to stay home for a few days for safety reasons. I sincerely hope situations like this won't happen again, for everyone's sake.

And, regarding work, I finally wrapped up a 14-month project.
It was a genuinely rewarding learning journey with both my team and the client.

Honorable mention: "Kakurenbo" by AliA.
I cannot love this song enough. I am still listening to it daily, even now.

"Demon Slayer" movie; Kimetsu no Yaiba - The Movie: Infinity Castle.
Gosh, the hype was unreal. Suddenly, it felt like everyone around me was into anime.

Adding "Glass Heart" as well, a Japanese dorama centered around music. Satoh Takeru has long been one of my favorite actors but, dang, he's also a good singer -- and the band's setlist is also great!

Thank you for the experience, cooperation, and kindness for the past 14 months!

---

Gratias, September

September came with another concert -- more on that in the honorable mention below!

That said, again, not every day was a good day.

A concert I was supposed to watch at the beginning of the month was cancelled due to some safety concerns I mentioned in my August recap.

There's also my flight back from Malaysia was delayed from 9:30pm to 12:25am.
When I finally arrived, there were no taxis available, and I had to wait another hour just to get home.

Not long after that, I visited my (new) house to check on its condition -- only to find puddles in the second-floor bedroom. Yes, the rooftop ceiling leaked.
I was... horrified, to say the least.

Still, there were good moments too, of course.
An old friend of mine gifted me a Time Turner -- thank you so much, fellow Potterhead!

Honorable mention: HIGHLIGHT: Ride or Die.
As I mentioned in April recap above, HIGHLIGHT is my number 1 idol group.
They're the only idols I've ever chased all the way to Thailand to watch their concert last year -- so of course I wasn't going to miss the chance to see them in Malaysia!

I went back to KL for this concert with my best friend -- we have same bias by the way: Yoseob!
It was an absolute blast, really. They are sooo good, so fine -- and yes, I took a lot of fancams!
Fingers crossed for many more concert experiences together!

Both of us finally got to see our number 1 bias!

---

Ευχαριστώ, Οκτώβριος

October opened with a visit to a new city: Pasuruan.
It was for work -- but hey, a new experience is still a new experience!

I also attended the annual management conference in Bandung.
I always look forward to the late-night talks with my colleagues; it's always fun and a highlight for me.

Still on the work front, one of my team members got married this month!
It's actually my first time attending a wedding party with my team (which has grown to quite a number and I'm somewhat proud? hehe).
It was a joy to be there and take photos together.

Honorable mention: "No Other Choice".
A very interesting film that reminded me of "Parasite".
There was one particular scene that made me laugh out loud. What an unexpected, good surprise.

My fourth year of attending the annual conference. Looking forward to next year.

---

Matur nuwun, November

November ended up being one of the longer recaps for this year -- and for good reason.

The month started on November 1st with a concert: HYDE [INSIDE].
I think I've been a fan of HYDE's voice for nearly 20 years...?
More precisely, I've loved L'Arc~en~Ciel -- the band that introduced me to J-Rock, a genre that has stayed close to my heart ever since.

'Interestingly', this concert was also connected to something else that happened later -- something I'll mention in the honorable section below.

I also attended the concert "the 1/9 tour by eaJ". I've been a fan of Jae since his days in Day6 and, as a solo performer, he truly impressed me. He felt incredibly down-to-earth, and his voice was just... WOW!!

Another concert followed: BLUE, the English boy band that was popular in the 2000s. Watching their live performance felt deeply nostalgic.

Beyond concerts, I also took a train trip to Jogjakarta for an office outing.
I arrived days earlier than the rest and managed to explore Jomblang Cave, a vertical cave that was both beautiful and challenging.
The trip included a Halloween-themed gala dinner, where I even got to wear a Ravenclaw student costume!

There was also a wedding celebration of one of my team members this month.
She's a lovely, cheerful, good friend of mine, so -- personally -- I was genuinely happy for her!

Honorable mention: How I lost my phone at a concert venue -- and somehow got it back.

Because of my own carelessness, I accidentally dropped my iPhone at a concert venue.
I only realized it about 15 minutes after leaving the venue.
To make things worse, the phone was in airplane mode. I did go back to look for it, but realistically, I knew the chances were very slim.

That night, I walked around 4 kilometers at 11pm, trying to calm myself down, accepting that it was my fault and there was nothing more I could do at the moment.

Then at 2am in the morning, one of the event promoter's staffs somehow found a way to contact me via Instagram and... they had found my phone!
Thank you for giving me faith that good people really do exist. :')

Also, the 3 concerts above.

Also, the Jogjakarta trip.

Oh, wow, my November was a busy month.

I'm not really into cosplay but, hey, it is fun to do this once in a while.

---

ありがとう、12月

And just like that, December, the final month of the year.

This was the month I somehow ended up visiting the dentist three Saturdays in a row. lol.

December was a noticeably busier month than last year's December.
Work-wise. Personal-life-wise. 2026-plan-wise.

I also assisted my team's year-end gathering, which included a Truth or Dare challenge. Unfortunately, I couldn't fully participate in the session because I had to handle some logistics for the event, but I was genuinely happy to hear that the event received positive feedback.

Oh, I only managed to watch one movie in cinemas this month: "Agak Laen 2".
Technically, I first watched it in November, but I went for a second viewing with my friends after board game meetup. It's such a fun movie to relieve your stress. lol

And speaking of how 'not every day is a good day',
on 30 December, I accidentally broke the LCD screen of my office laptop.
13.5 years working without ever damaging office equipment, and somehow the lesson arrived right at the end of 2025. Pfft.

Honorable mention: "My Hero Academia".
Okay. So here's the thing.
The anime started back in 2016, but I only began watching it in August 2025. To be honest, I didn't binge it nonstop. I paused a few times because it didn't fully hook me at the beginning.

Still, I'm glad I kept going and, gosh, MHA ended up becoming one of my favorite anime series: strong character development, great music, and an engaging way of delivering the story, even with a fairly classic shounen plot.

The anime series finally concluded in December 2025, and the praise for its animation was well deserved for sure!

Also, "Knives Out 3: Wake Up Dead Man".
Just watch it.

I don't really take a lot of pics in December, so here's Loki for you.

And, here we are, on the very last day of 2024.

2024 might not be my favorite year that I'd like to remember.
In the beginning of the year, I already faced some personal challenges which I don't really like to reminisce.

It's only 8 hours away to midnight a.k.a. the new year so, let me start my 16th annual recap of life!

For  previous references: 2008 | 2009 | 2010 | 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021 | 2022 | 2023

01 | JANUARY

My first day of January began with a car drive to PIK 2 with family and, nope, I would not recommend going there on New Year. I was stuck for 2.5 hours when driving back home.

The rocks started rolling down on 12 January and... let's just say more challenges come at me when I was not really at my best state.

Thankfully, I have friends who gave me mental support. Thank you so much, you and you and you. I could not survive the year without you guys for sure.

There is not much I could (or want to) recall about January 2024 - despite it's supposed to be one of my favorite months. I guess 2024 is just not it?

First experience: Is a (true) heartbreak counted as an experience? Haha.
January movie: "Sehidup Semati". Pretty good for a thriller movie.
Watched it on the day that I wish I could return to.



02 | FEBRUARY

Work-wise, made a trip to Bogor. Self-wise, went through another roller coaster of life.

I could be happy in an hour but then melancholic in another hour. I remembered pieces of memories about 2023 mostly in February for so many reasons. Well, apparently, 2023 is a better year for me and I realized how much I was attached to the past.

First experience: Crochet. Yes, I managed to finish something made by crochet.
February movie: "The Holdovers". A heartwarming one.



03 | MARCH

Probably the month that hit me low and high at the same time.

I attended Ed Sheeran's concert at JIS and took a flight to Singapore the next week to watch... Taylor Swift! Yes, I attended The Eras Tour - thanks to a friend of mine at office who offered the ticket to me. Definitely one of the best moments to remember in 2024.

Also visited Harry Potter: Forbidden Forest Experience while I was there.

During March, I also celebrated Easter week in Jakarta and Bogor. Apparently, again, during this month, I kept myself being reminded of the past... again.

First experience: Apparently, despite it's my 8th time visiting Singapore, this is the very first time I went there as a solo traveler.
March movie: None. But I watched 2 concerts!



04 | APRIL

April 2023 holds a lot of good memories so it's natural that I compared this month with last year, right? Haha. Well, comparison is one thing but being disappointed is another thing, no?

I dragged myself to Bandung for one and two reasons during April and made another haircut. This time, I cut it to shoulder length again (and a little bit regretting it until now).

First experience: Picking flowers to be arranged as a bouquet.
April movie: "Siksa Kubur". Not exactly my favorite horror movie but a lot of people recommended this.



05 | MAY

Despite it's still less memorable than last year's May, at least this month marked me being happy for certain days. For example, on the 12th day and near to my birthday. My birthday... Well, I'm certainly blessed because friends sending me food and greetings.

Also managed to enjoy dinner with friends in Tangerang, claim free/discounted birthday dine-in at restaurants, jumped in a Ferris wheel after sunset, received birthday presents, and everything that made me thankful.

First experience: CFD run. Just because. Don't ask if I want to join again.
May movie: "Abigail". Definitely a favorite of mine this year.
Oh, "How To Make Million Before Grandma Dies" is also a nice movie to enjoy.



06 | JUNE

Thinking about June, I think I spent a lot of my night working late at the office.

However, I actually took another flight this year after Singapore as a solo traveler.
Destination: Thailand!

I arrived in Bangkok on 28 June, went to the Ancient City on 29 June, attended Sunday Mass at Assumption Cathedral on 30 June and... the highlight of the trip...

LIGHTS GO ON, AGAIN.
HIGHLIGHT concert.
The whole reason why I went to Bangkok.

I became a fan of B2ST since 2011 and it's been 7 years since I watched them live (KOCCA event in Jakarta). Indonesia is not in their country list to visit so, oh, I'd fly for them for sure!

Well, June might be one of my favorite months along with March this year.

First experience: Ripley's Believe It or Not! As per now, I believe there are only 3 museums of Ripley's in Asia: Genting (Malaysia), Dubai (UAE), and Pattaya (Thailand).
June movie: "Inside Out 2". Not a fan of animated movie but I like this one (and the first one as well).



07 | JULY

How could I describe July?
I had one of the best 2-3 hours during this month and then regrets on some other days.
Is it good or not then? Well...

There's a farewell to a colleague this July, and a best friend of mine had a launching of her laundry business, went to Bogor for culinary trip because a friend just had a car.

First experience: Layover at airport. Yes, I spent a night in Changi during my trip back from Bangkok.
July movie: "Longlegs" for horror, "Deadpool & Wolverine" for superhero/comedy.



08 | AUGUST

I'd say this month is more about movie and TV series for me. I watched 4 movies at cinemas, more on streaming platform. I also got to play another boardgame session with friends, met with a friend who would have a special day in December.

Is this a good month to remember?
I wouldn't say that - but there are worse ones for sure.

First experience: Honestly, I don't think there is anything new I did this month. Haha.
August movie: "Pilot", a very fun movie but I couldn't help fangirling for "Detective Conan: Millian Dollar Pentagram".
"Maharaja" on Netflix made it to one of the best plot twists in movie for me.



09 | SEPTEMBER

It's a month of celebration with PwC Festival at Tennis Indoor Senayan,
and then Assurance Management Conference in Bandung,
and then meeting an ex-colleague whom I haven't met for more than a year.

Yet there is also a heartbreaking day as one of my close friends lost his family.

First experience: Working at airport while waiting for a friend. People thought I was flying somewhere again, lol.
September movie: "Speak No Evil". People said the original is better though.



10 | OCTOBER

This belongs to the 'first experience' but I think it deserves longer paragraph so... I joined a group trip for hiking trip. Yes, you read it right. Hiking.

Took a bus to Wonosobo on 25 October, we climbed on 26 morning and stayed in a tent to watch the sunrise at Prau Sunrise Camp. Took the bus back to Jakarta afterwards and back to work on 27, woot!

Better month than previous but, still, can't top last year, unfortunately.

First experience: Building handover. I'll talk about this in 2025. I promise.
October movie: "Home Sweet Loan". Also attended the movie special screening!
"Smile 2" is also a recommended horror movie!



11 | NOVEMBER

A month with hustle bustle: Dufan with colleagues, Japanese Film Festival, New Mall visit to Agora, Blok M culinary night, (Highlight) Concert Movie, BSD culinary day.

Oh, I broke my S-Pen, HAHA. Okay, that's sad.

Can't write much because, well, it's a pretty normal month. I think it's a good sign to be normal, no?

First experience: Orchestra concert (The Legends 10: Magic). It felt so magical to hear the orchestra live, playing the music from my favorite fantasy movies.
November movie: "Red One". Why is it not a December movie though?
And, of course, "Wicked". Go watch it if you like musical!



12 | DECEMBER

December should be my favorite month, seriously. Well, at least, that's how usually things are every year. I guess I couldn't play favorite too often.

It was fun on early December days with the whole talky things but went a little bit downhill on the next week.

Still, I made myself busy with dental visit, cleaning up the house, badminton (kinda a regular this year), trying Timeleft for the first time, catching up with friends.

15 December is a happy day for sure! I received the honor to be a bridesmaid for a friend of mine, whom I have known since junior high school. So happy for you two!
Also tried a role-playing game experience on 29 December with friends. I'd like to try again actually, despite realizing I am far from mystery solver, lol.

First experience: Gift exchange with Pilates group. Yes, Pilates, you read it right. Kinda try to start healthy(er) activities a bit.
December movie: "Bila Esok Ibu Tiada". Had put this in queue for a while and finally watched this heartwarming/heartbreaking movie with top-notch performance from the casts!



And... that's it.
12 months. 366 days.

It seems like I compare each month with last years a little bit too much in this post, right?
I know, I also realize that, but it does not mean I'm not grateful of this year.

I'm blessed enough to experience a lot of new things and I'm truly grateful.

I just hope 2025 will be better.
I hope yours too. :)

My first post in 2024!

It's been a long, long, long time I actually posted something which is not a recap, short story, or travel summary. I actually want to write something about life and how I view it for today.

It's a short post, I think.

It's the 13th day in 2024 and I have been taken on a roller coaster of mixed emotion. Is it good? Is it bad? At this very moment, I would not say it's the best moment to record in 2024 -- considering January is usually one of my favorite months of the year.

How would I put it in words?

You know when you really, really want something,
and you cannot have it but, eventually, with time and effort spent, you finally get it?
And, yet, one day, you're told that you can't have it anymore,
which makes you really sad that you don't want to let it go.

Some said it's attachment issue.
We should not be to attached to another thing or person or environment.

I agree. 100% agree.

Being kind does not mean you sacrifice yourself for others.
Being happy does not mean you should make others happy when it gives you unhappiness.

Yet it's very understandable for us to grieve and question ourselves:
Why should we let it go? What did we do wrong for this to happen?
How could we prevent or stop this from happening?

We try to tie things down when it might only hurt ourselves.
We are unable to answer those questions because we feel like it's the best to keep how things are at the moment.

Oh well, give it some time, people said.
You'll learn to let go.

Okay. Minutes turn to hours, hours turn to days.
You think to yourself, I still can see it anyway.
It's still there but not completely mine.
It's better than nothing.

However, it makes you wonder.
If spending time and effort back in those old days make you able to achieve it,
why couldn't it work again after you let it go?

Maybe you should repeat it again.
The time.
Maybe you didn't do it enough.
The effort.

Who could tell us that maybe it's not the problem.
That sometimes things are not meant to be.
That maybe the future seems bleak now but it might shift to clearer sky soon.
That there are better things are in store for you.

No one could tell us that.
Sorry, everyone can tell us that, but we would never listen to them anyway.
We believe what we want to believe when we're grieving.

You wish things stay the same.
Because you feel that it's the best that you can have.
Because you feel that if you put more time and effort, things might change.

And yet the change might not be for the better.

But it's natural for us to be sad, to feel broken, to ask for understanding,
to wish for things to stay the same,
because, somehow, the feelings we have from the start,
poured into the actions and words you have given in every second thinking about it,
they stay in your heart.

It never fades away.

Endlessly.