Tuesday, July 29, 2014

‡ Society for Us ‡

I just read something this afternoon and, after I read it, I gave it a thought.
Just a little, I guess, but I felt the urge to post a blog about it.
Considering how long I've been absent from posting here, I guess it's worth to write.

Ever heard of the encouraging quote "just be yourself"?
Or perhaps "don't give a damn of what people think about you", "be original", or just simply "be you!"?
I read those words here and there.
Not that I'm saying they are no good because, yes, they serve their objectives well: to encourage people.

Me, too, is no different. I like those words.
I have a very low self-esteem despite putting pride as my highest mistake most of the times (trust me, I'm trying my best to get rid of this lack of confidence, but, well, things take time).

If people ask me what I'm good at, I don't know the answer.
I can cook but it's just so-so. I can speak English but it's at the average state. I can write but never produce anything very good. I have a work but I can't learn very fast like the others. I'm just an average person at every field I do.
A good friend told me that it's my strength; knowing so many fields and work them because not everyone could do it but, then again, my negative thinking always takes afterwards.

What does it have to do with the quote "just be yourself"?

they told her she was ugly
so she believed it
(even though she was the most beautiful girl I had ever laid my eyes upon)

they told her she was loud
so she stopped speaking
(even though her wise words commanded my attention)

they told her she was dumb
so she stopped thinking
(even though she had the most brilliant and curious mind I have ever encountered)

they told her she had no talent
so she stopped having fun
(even though she could light up an entire room with her energy)

they told her she was lazy
so she stopped sleeping
(even though her life was the nightmare)

they told her she was too quiet
so she made small talk
(even though the voices in her head never ceased to quiet)

they told her she was too sad
so she faked another smile
(even though she was far from being happy)

they told her she wasn't enough
so she became nothing
(even though she was everything to me)

In my opinion, no matter how many times we remind ourselves that we just need to be original, to ignore the words of disagreement and all, we live in a world of different people.
We live in a society which has many different opinions; some might like us and some might don't because we can't make everyone happy.

After all, we, human beings, are social creatures.

We thrive in community.
We connect with one another.
We see what we don't have in others.
We understand about what we don't know from them.
We talk about ourselves to them.
We listen to their words.

True that everything returns to us again; whether you want to agree with them or just ignore their thoughts.
Then again, will it ever stop?

Society does have big impacts in our lives.

Every word, even the little talk, might affect someone else; for better or for worse.

"Your sister is prettier than you."
"You talked too much. Can you shut up?"
"How can you be so stupid?"
"Can you do anything right?"
"Do something useful, you lazy head!"
"Talk about something. Don't be an anti-social."
"You're too gloomy and melancholy."
"You can't do anything better than him."

Those words could just pass some people but those exactly some words might leave scars on others, as if the world couldn't accept them the way they are.
I'm not going to say I am a saint who never hurt other by words because, even though I don't realize it, I'm sure I have done that and I'm not proud of it.
Nevertheless, I want to avoid hurting others because I know how painful it feels. Like I said, it could leave scars.

Words hurt.
They don't make you bleed. They don't give you visible scars.
But they are painful when we are fed up with hurting, cutting words.

It's alright to give criticism but, remember, criticize with understanding.
You give input for make someone better, not the otherwise.
Everyone has good in them.

We're definitely not perfect but we need to try to be the best for ourselves.
Sometimes it's funny how society tells us to be ourselves yet they tell us that it's the 'wrong' way to be ourselves; really, God loves us the way we are, so love yourself too.
It's okay to make mistake. It's okay to be different. It's okay to listen to people. It's okay to change to be better for others.

But, like a quote said, don't just be good to others.

Be good to yourself too.


credit for the image(s) goes to the original owner(s)